As one book concludes
and another ensues,
the Looking-Glass offers a much different view.
Though Alice’s Wonderland
was all upside-down,
her Looking-Glass House is quite inside-out.
Reflections from the outside
looking in-to,
are literal albeit a slightly new view.
But what awaits within
the inside-in,
are purposes transformative, deep and destined.
What is there to be found
and be made to matter,
requires a courage unlike any other.
‘Cause, fall into one’s lap
the value will not,
so one must intend to step through and opt.
Sweet Caty :: May 22, 2018
Tonight my sweet Caty graduated 8th grade. She is a beautiful soul. I am so very proud of WHO she is.
I wish I could write more, but I’m exhausted. I got home from Florida at 1:30 this morning, didn’t sleep very well for the few hours I had, woke up and went to work and had a very busy day, came home and helped get my graduate all ready, and then graduation. And then I came home and looked at pictures and just started crying. I don’t like looking at pictures of myself….and if I’m being honest, I really want to use the word “hate” tonight….I hate pictures of myself. Ugh. My body is sore. My heart is tired.
Sitting in the “And” :: May 22, 2019
Consider the word “and”….
Now consider the word “but”…..
I’ve had some interesting conversations with my intern at work about these two small but (or and) mighty words. 😉
Consider replacing “but” with “and” and see what you get. As I’ve learned this and practiced it, I notice that it is far more gracious, it is far more hopeful, it is far more honoring to actuality. It is another way to practice acknowledging the tensions that exist in life.
I can be frustrated AND faithful at the same time. Or take this for example: How does this concept change the meaning of the following sentence –
“Lord, I don’t know why but I trust your goodness”
“Lord, I don’t know why and I trust your goodness”
Or what about this one:
“Cancer has been devastating but I can be grateful”
“Cancer has been devastating and I can be grateful”
Yet another example:
“Before cancer my priorities were all wrong but I’ve learned a lot about rearranging them”
“Before cancer my priorities were all wrong and I’ve learned a lot about rearranging them”
It might seem like an insignificant little switch-a-roo, yet the subtlety can be quite powerful. “And” leaves room for grace. “But” creates a space for shame. Two little three-letter words with a world of difference in-between….
*Lightbulb* Moment :: May 22, 2020
Making decisions is hard—to do something or not to do something—is not black and white as though it would sound. There is actually rarely a black and white decision and I can probably count on one hand the number of black and white decisions that I have been confronted with in my life. 1. Do I believe in Jesus as my Savior? Definite yes. 2. Do I want to get married and have a family? Definite yes. 3. You have cancer…do you want to battle? Definite yes. But that is literally all I can think of (I mean, besides ‘should I wear clothes’ and ‘do you want another cup of coffee’). All of the other decisions in my life have been door #1, door #2, door #3 or sometimes even door #47. So decision making, even when seemingly simple, is not really all that simple. Multiple factors play into a decision and then whichever first-level factor you go with, there are second-level, third-level, forty-seventh-level factors that follow…all of which have their own 47 levels. Complex, no doubt.
Now, throw in decision making when there is a big-hitting, life-as-we-know-it-destroying circumstantial upheaval……….. and you find yourself in level I-Lost-Count.
Take this pandemic as a filter: The seemingly simple things (like wearing a mask or getting a vaccine or not shaking hands) – – – are not actually so simple. The layers are quite complex. And the emotional tie to each of those layers are then exponentially more complex. Throw in the fact that no matter which way we turn, a new study shows “this” which totally contradicts what studies showed “that” yesterday. Everyone is publishing something as soon and as fast as they can because of some sort of rat-race to the ‘answer’ because we are all dying for answers because answers mean progress because progress is better than staying put in a really hard circumstance. So…a seemingly simple decision yesterday was just now made far more complicated today because we can’t escape the inundation of information no matter how hard we try (and the scary part being that our escape from it all is either total isolation or total mental faculty shutdown. Yikes.) No wonder we are fraying at the edges. Or maybe even completely unraveled.
Now, multiply this by each individual human in their own unique story. . .For me, personally, inside all of this, I also have a body, soul, heart and mind ravaged by cancer (a MASSIVE filter in and of itself), a family and a marriage already marred deeply because of other traumas, kids rocked by another total halt to life as they knew it way before we were even remotely ‘healed’ from the last one, as well as a kid who’s senior year was scarred for life. All of which bring about their own complex layers to even the simplest of decisions. Not to mention how all of this is impacting our world views and perceptions of reality (which…….we come full circle…….impact all of our decisions). *whoa.
Can you relate?